Webster's dictionary defines the word PREJUDICE:
1. injury or damage resulting from some judgment or action of another in disregard of one's rights;
2. preconceived judgement or opinion; an adverse opinion or leaning formed without just grounds or before sufficient knowledge.
"The Lesson" part 2 by John S LES
That night when Billy Ray went to bed that night with a slight chills to his body in spite of the fact that he was sweating. His wife Carla thought that his uneasiness and chills was due to witnessing the accident scene or that he was coming down with a flu. Either way he grabbed a blanket and took to sleeping on the sofa to avoid the possibility of getting her sick.
6:15am the next morning...as the early summer sunlight beamed through his windows Billy Ray awakened still feeling a little groggy from the hard sleep he had went through during the night. He got up rubbing the crust out of his eyes and walked to where he thought his bathroom was at his ranch style home. But somehow he misjudged it's location and walks into a closet doorway, which feels a little taller to him than normal.
He shakes it off and finally makes his way into the bathroom door. It appears to have changed. The fittings seem older and more traditional similar to a style he remembered when he was a little boy at his parents house. As he approached the sink, he could see that his hands and arms were smaller...and a deep chocolate brown. Billy Ray began to panic as he looked down at his bare feet and they too were brown.
Realizing that the mirror over the sink was too high for him to just look over, he stepped up onto the toilet lid and looked into the mirror at his face. It too was a rich chocolate brown. The face of a handsome, young black boy stricken with fear of his own reflection. He recognized his new face as being the boyhood face to Michael Ray Singleton, the man who's death he had caused the night before.
It wasn't long before Michael Ray's parents, Douglas and Evangeline, also awakened and found him in the bathroom staring at himself as if he had gone a little crazy. Clearly they were his black parents and he was now a black child. No matter what his mind was telling him to say of this horror, the words wouldn't come out. He could only listen as some greater forced controlled him. A force which caused him to run to and hug his parents. A force which allowed him to feel the absolute love that he had for his parents.
After they left, Billy Ray kept struggling to tell himself that he was still in his home laying in bed sick, and that this was only a bad dream. But nothing he did could or would wake him into another level of consciousness. This experience, was real. He could see and feel everything that Michael Ray was experiencing. Billy was living inside his body. All he could do was just sit back and observe what Michael Ray was experiencing.
Then as Billy Ray laid back down several years and many life learning lessons that Michael Ray experienced growing up as his parents, older brother and sister, endured when they moved from Arlington, Texas to Springfield, Queens, New York in the late 1970's. He was only 5 years old. With each mind spinning and painful memory, Billy could feel how Michael Ray and his siblings were teased and ostracized by the mixed but predominantly black and Hispanic neighborhood for their "country" accents.
In addition, there were attempts made to break up the defacto segregation in the area via zone changes and busing students from the nearby Andrew, Jackson high school 30 minutes further north to Francis Lewis high school. These early attempts lead to small riots and Michael Ray's brother's middle school bus getting hit with stones and the windows being shattered. Billy feels the fear, the sadness and despair that Michael Ray's 5 year old eyes and mind felt as he witnessed this. Then he see how the neighborhood began to change in the early very early 1980's...a change for the worse.
Small business owners and many working class people, white, black and Hispanic began moving out of the neighborhood, leaving a vacuum for people remaining there to watch the area deteriorate and become home to a more criminal minded element. Michael Ray's father struggled with work. He originally moved north to get involved with his jazz music talents, but new genres of music was emerging and his parents had to find other jobs. His mother took a job with the Post Office and his father took a job with the Long Island Railroad as a conductor. Meanwhile his older brother, searching for an identity tougher and separate from the family's "hillbilly" reputation. Billy Ray could feel the pain in Michael's heart when his older brother Robert was first arrested for possession of drugs, with intent to sell at 15 years of age. It tore apart his father and mother. To make matters even worse, his father lost his job at the LIRR as they experienced cutbacks. Last hired, first fired. Now he too had to struggle with odd end jobs, to help his family survive.
As Michael entered the 7th grade, it was here that he would meet and befriend his lifetime best friend, Dylan O'Conner. Michael's relationship with his brother Robert was nearly completely severed due to Robert's going in and out of jail over the years. Although he had made many friends along the way on his own, it was his friendship with Dylan that would prove to be very influential. Dylan's family came from a poor, mostly white town in upstate New York. Dylan's father was an alcoholic who worked the trucking industry. When he was home, he was usually drunk. When he was working he would be gone weeks at a time. Dylan's mother got a job at the post office with Michael's mother. The two mother's became close friends, just like their two sons.
As the two boys were in the 9th grade, their friendship was tested when four black teens tried to jump Dylan outside the high school just because he was white. Michael and Dylan fought their way to safety. A year later in high school, both of them made the basketball, team and when they were 16, they took a bus trip to purchase a Sony Walkman that was on sale at a electronics store in Fresh Meadows. They were confronted by a group of about 5 white teens, who wanted to attack Michael because he was black. Dylan broke his hand defending Michael and couldn't play the rest of the season.
Billy Ray could feel all of this going through his mind, body and soul. It was if he was on a train going to an unknown destination, yet he knew what the final destination of that train would be. He remembered looking right into Michael Ray's eyes as he compressed the last breaths out of him. He wanted this painful ride to be over. But it was only just beginning. It was only just beginning...
1. injury or damage resulting from some judgment or action of another in disregard of one's rights;
2. preconceived judgement or opinion; an adverse opinion or leaning formed without just grounds or before sufficient knowledge.
"The Lesson" part 2 by John S LES
©
That night when Billy Ray went to bed that night with a slight chills to his body in spite of the fact that he was sweating. His wife Carla thought that his uneasiness and chills was due to witnessing the accident scene or that he was coming down with a flu. Either way he grabbed a blanket and took to sleeping on the sofa to avoid the possibility of getting her sick.
6:15am the next morning...as the early summer sunlight beamed through his windows Billy Ray awakened still feeling a little groggy from the hard sleep he had went through during the night. He got up rubbing the crust out of his eyes and walked to where he thought his bathroom was at his ranch style home. But somehow he misjudged it's location and walks into a closet doorway, which feels a little taller to him than normal.
He shakes it off and finally makes his way into the bathroom door. It appears to have changed. The fittings seem older and more traditional similar to a style he remembered when he was a little boy at his parents house. As he approached the sink, he could see that his hands and arms were smaller...and a deep chocolate brown. Billy Ray began to panic as he looked down at his bare feet and they too were brown.
Realizing that the mirror over the sink was too high for him to just look over, he stepped up onto the toilet lid and looked into the mirror at his face. It too was a rich chocolate brown. The face of a handsome, young black boy stricken with fear of his own reflection. He recognized his new face as being the boyhood face to Michael Ray Singleton, the man who's death he had caused the night before.
It wasn't long before Michael Ray's parents, Douglas and Evangeline, also awakened and found him in the bathroom staring at himself as if he had gone a little crazy. Clearly they were his black parents and he was now a black child. No matter what his mind was telling him to say of this horror, the words wouldn't come out. He could only listen as some greater forced controlled him. A force which caused him to run to and hug his parents. A force which allowed him to feel the absolute love that he had for his parents.
After they left, Billy Ray kept struggling to tell himself that he was still in his home laying in bed sick, and that this was only a bad dream. But nothing he did could or would wake him into another level of consciousness. This experience, was real. He could see and feel everything that Michael Ray was experiencing. Billy was living inside his body. All he could do was just sit back and observe what Michael Ray was experiencing.
Then as Billy Ray laid back down several years and many life learning lessons that Michael Ray experienced growing up as his parents, older brother and sister, endured when they moved from Arlington, Texas to Springfield, Queens, New York in the late 1970's. He was only 5 years old. With each mind spinning and painful memory, Billy could feel how Michael Ray and his siblings were teased and ostracized by the mixed but predominantly black and Hispanic neighborhood for their "country" accents.
In addition, there were attempts made to break up the defacto segregation in the area via zone changes and busing students from the nearby Andrew, Jackson high school 30 minutes further north to Francis Lewis high school. These early attempts lead to small riots and Michael Ray's brother's middle school bus getting hit with stones and the windows being shattered. Billy feels the fear, the sadness and despair that Michael Ray's 5 year old eyes and mind felt as he witnessed this. Then he see how the neighborhood began to change in the early very early 1980's...a change for the worse.
Small business owners and many working class people, white, black and Hispanic began moving out of the neighborhood, leaving a vacuum for people remaining there to watch the area deteriorate and become home to a more criminal minded element. Michael Ray's father struggled with work. He originally moved north to get involved with his jazz music talents, but new genres of music was emerging and his parents had to find other jobs. His mother took a job with the Post Office and his father took a job with the Long Island Railroad as a conductor. Meanwhile his older brother, searching for an identity tougher and separate from the family's "hillbilly" reputation. Billy Ray could feel the pain in Michael's heart when his older brother Robert was first arrested for possession of drugs, with intent to sell at 15 years of age. It tore apart his father and mother. To make matters even worse, his father lost his job at the LIRR as they experienced cutbacks. Last hired, first fired. Now he too had to struggle with odd end jobs, to help his family survive.
As Michael entered the 7th grade, it was here that he would meet and befriend his lifetime best friend, Dylan O'Conner. Michael's relationship with his brother Robert was nearly completely severed due to Robert's going in and out of jail over the years. Although he had made many friends along the way on his own, it was his friendship with Dylan that would prove to be very influential. Dylan's family came from a poor, mostly white town in upstate New York. Dylan's father was an alcoholic who worked the trucking industry. When he was home, he was usually drunk. When he was working he would be gone weeks at a time. Dylan's mother got a job at the post office with Michael's mother. The two mother's became close friends, just like their two sons.
As the two boys were in the 9th grade, their friendship was tested when four black teens tried to jump Dylan outside the high school just because he was white. Michael and Dylan fought their way to safety. A year later in high school, both of them made the basketball, team and when they were 16, they took a bus trip to purchase a Sony Walkman that was on sale at a electronics store in Fresh Meadows. They were confronted by a group of about 5 white teens, who wanted to attack Michael because he was black. Dylan broke his hand defending Michael and couldn't play the rest of the season.
Billy Ray could feel all of this going through his mind, body and soul. It was if he was on a train going to an unknown destination, yet he knew what the final destination of that train would be. He remembered looking right into Michael Ray's eyes as he compressed the last breaths out of him. He wanted this painful ride to be over. But it was only just beginning. It was only just beginning...
No comments:
Post a Comment